DOCTOR DOCTOR
Scene 1:( Clinic office, Doctor sleeping in his room by putting his legs on the table. Nurse is making make up outside the door in front of a compact mirror. Compounder sits in front of the door on a chair, reading news paper.Patients waiting for hours in waiting lounge.)
(The first patient enters).P1 –(general problem)old man walking with a baton)
- ______Oh! ! ! ! oh,!!!! I am dying, my back hurts, my stomach aches, my legs trembles, oh!!! Oh!!! , where is doctor's room?
(Nobody pays any attention to him, compounder reads newspaper.).
P1: There is no one who can help this old man to show where is doctor's office?
P1 ( looks right and left, still neither the nurse nor the compounder shows any interest in him.)
(He walks to compounder, by puffing, almost falling to the floor, still no help..)
P1: Son, son, excuse me!
(Compounder finally looks up, but not very happy about the disturbance.)
C: Are you talking to me uncle..?.
P1: . My back hurts, my stomach aches and my legs trembles, I have to see Doc.
Compounder folds his newspaper and stands up.
C : You want to see Doc.? Do you have an appointment?
P1:No. I don't have an appointment. But I really need to see doctor(he puffs and huffs)
C: Sorry, doctor is a busy person, busy like a bee, biizzt biizzzt (makes the bee sound) he does not have free time at all (Doctor snores loudly) Go get an appointment.
P1: My Child, don't you see I can't even walk properly, my heart is aching when I breath
(Old man really having problem to breath,)
P1- At least you can ask him maybe he sees me, I can't breathe.. (makes choking sounds)
(Compounder is not much impressed from the old man's situation.)
C: well let's try to ask, but I am not promising anything.
(Compounder knocks the door and enters, he sees doc sleeping, slowly closes the door.)
C: Nope, he is indeed very busy, (makes bee sound again). Can't accept you now uncle.
(Old man clearly having a heart attack, tries to move back takes two steps back and goes out.(Shouts appear from the microphone)Compounder resumes his newspaper.
(Narrator 1)-Hey that old man fall on the floor
(Narrator 2)_ He is holding his heart I guess he is having a heart attack.
(Narrator 1)-He is turning blue, oh my GOD he is dying (more shouts)
(Narrator 2)-he is dying, he is dying. HE IS DEAD.
(The nurse finally finishes her makeup and comes with the files.)
(Nurse to compounder)-Oh you heard an old man died in the gate from heart attack!
(Compounder)- How old was he?
(Nurse)-They say pretty old. Some people does not come to see doctor regularly ,after 35, you should have regular health check-ups ,cardiology, radiology, methodology, logy , logy, logy isn't it!, don't do these things then one attack and whoops gone ( makes the sign of a plane take off)(she should sway her hips when she talks to emphasize the meanings of her words)
(Compounder nods his head in agreement.)
-Health is not a joke, you should take it seriously especially when you are closer to other side than this side ..
(Both nurse and compounder smiles to his joke.)
C: Should I start calling patients?
N: Who's is the first one?
C: Bob the Builder, BOB THE BUILDER..
(A very fat patient (P2) appears.)
( he is eating two burgers in his both hands)(turns to audience and says)
P2: I am BOB (pauses) THE BUILDER.
N; I can see, you are still building, Bob. Follow me pls.
(Nurse opens the door and enters)
N; , waki- waki, rise and shine, time to wake, we have patients..(in a melodic , almost singing voice)
(Doc stretches and yawns and stretches and yawns and finally opens his eyes.)
D: I am up, I am good, I am ready to roll..
N: your coffee doc. (she puts the first file on the table)
D; Thank you nurse, you are a life saver. (He sips his coffee and opens the file)
D: BOB the Builder
(They both look the door; Bob is stuck to the door but still eating.)
P2: I am stuck. This door shrunk! -----whines but did not stop eating even then
D; you look more like stuffed to me. We need to get you through though. (he stands and comes closely to inspect the situation) can u try to slide?
(Patient 2 tries no success)
- Nope, I told you doc, this door has shrunk.
D; Well, I am a scientist. So I am open to the possibilities, nurse please take a note, the door has shrunk, let the maintenance department investigate the situation.
(He pulls the patient, nothing happens)
Doc.-Hey, nurse some help here
(Nurse also picks and arm and try to pull, still nothing)
D; Hey compounder can you push Bob the builder from that side?
C; yes. doc
(Doc counts till 3 and three of them push and pulls him and finally patient 2 enters by falling on doc and nurse and compounder on them.)
D: get me out, get him off.
(P2 and C stand up and help doc and nurse to stand up)
N: I didn't want to do heavy labour that's why I become a nurse, ----- whines terribly.
(P2 is picking food pieces which fall on doc and nurse and keep on eating)
Bob –it's is not good to waste the food now, isn't it?
D.( dust himself whereas nurse opens her compact mirror and check her hair and refresh her make up.)
D; yes, Mr. Builder, what is your problem? (He sits back)
P2; It's MR. THE BUILDER , Doc, not Builder .Don't forget THE . I came here because I want to be slim, I know you have to be happy with what you are, but well, I am not. I want to wear large size. I want to bend without tumbling, I need your help Doc. help me.
D; Mr. The Builder , I told you last week as well, you need to go to dietician, you are obese, without a strict diet and exercise I cannot do anything.
P2; I cannot do that Doc .i cannot stop eating. Common!!!!!!!!!!, c'mon,!!!!! give a pill, give anything, CAN WE FIX THIS?(raise his voice)
D; No, we can't.( calm) You need diet, you need exercise….(he writes a prescription and gives it to him).Take these pills twice a day, it will help to speed your system.
(Bob happy to get some medication, thanks and leaves.)
(N to dcr); isn't that medicine gives diarrhea?
D: As I said, it will speed his system; I just didn't mention which system.
(Compounder calls the third patient.)
C; Snow dwarf. Mr. Snow Dwarf.
(A very short patient appears.)
C: your name is familiar, where did I hear it before?
P3; snow white is my great auntie, and yes before you ask, the prince who married her was not actually 6 feet.
(He enters the doc office.)
(Doc sees the door open but cannot see the patient, raises from his seat to see)
D; Oh, here you are!!!!! …Mr. snow dwarf, it's good to see you.(When they both settles down) what can I do for you?
P3; well doc, I have a genetic problem, you can see my height is little less than average.
N; little less than a pony!!!! (murmurs to herself)
P3: So, I met this girl last week in a movie theatre. She is really nice and I want to impress her, in short, I want you to make me 6 feet tall.
D: ok, please go to the physical examination table.
(P3 goes there, nurse helps him to lay. D comes and examines him,)
-Everything seems working properly, now nurse will give an injection it should help your bones to grow.
(Doc goes back to his desk; nurse brings out a biiiig injection,)
P3: oh, nurse what is this? Shouts
N: hush now, you heard the doc.you need to grow, think big, think reallyyy BIG…(makes an evil laugh)
P3 SHOUTS….
D to Nurse: I am going to see a patient , I will be back in ½ an hour.
N: ok, doc.
(Doctor and nurse leaves, compounder enters doc office, he is always wanted to be stylish like a doc, so he touches the table the papers in awe.)
C: lovely!, look at here, being a doctor is so!!!!!! Important, so respectful job, anybody cannot be simply a doctor. You have to be smart and hardworking…
(he wears doctors extra coat and appreciate himself) – very good , me and doc wears the same size. People say we look a lot alike as well.(he sits doctor's table,) - yes, that's nice..
(P4 is a truck driver , almost blind. Knocks the door,- Excuse me, doc can I come in?)
(Compounder looks stunned.)- Err, actually ( he raises )
P4: I am sorry to disturb you without appointment doc. but I am not able to see very clearly, and I am a truck driver.
C (looks doubtful.)
_ you said, you can't see very clearly?
P4: yes! I thought it's just temporary but still I have problem with that.
Compounder at that moment decides to feel to be a doctor.
C: ok! What's your name?
P4: My name is Evergreen Longsight!.
C: apparently you don't have a problem with long sight. So its short sight bothering you.
P4: I guess so.(confused)
C; No worries.let us check it.
(Compounder comes and checks the eyes with a small laser pen all the time make s himmm, hummm, sounds like he knows what he is doing.)
C; ok you need to read these letters.
He points the first letter.
(P4 looks tries, nope I can't see it.)
C; I will give you a hint, first letter in the alphabet.
P4; letter A
C : brilliant ….this letter now
P4: I can't make it…
C: what is the 4 th number ?
P4: with zero or without?
C: without
P4; number 4
C; very good, the next one pls.
P4 looks expectedly to the doc.
C: the second letter in alphabet but half cut
P4 thinks,- letter d
C: awesome.. your eye sight is good Mr. longsight. There is nothing wrong with it. i will advise you to get some vitamin tablets and rest. driving trucks can be quite stressful. rest, rest, rest
(P4 happy to hear he has no problems thanks and tries to go out but tumbles and almost fall down like a blind person)
(C turns to audience..)
‘Its good to help ppl, isint it?”
