Cast: Timmy: Steve: Rick:
*( Everyone walks on and starts talking)
Rick: Hey you guys wanna go see that new movie?
Timmy: Oh whats it called
Rick: The Hangover 6
Timmy: Dude that sounds awesome! What’s it supposed to be about?
Rick: A couple of dudes wake up, can’t remember the night before…but here’s the best part…they wake up in Madagascar!
Timmy: What?! That’s gonna be way different from the last 5!
Steve: That sounds Fo’ Shnitzel!
*(Timmy and Rick turn towards Rick)
Rick: woah woah woah, what did you just say?
Steve: you know.. Fo’ Shnitzel
Timmy: uuuuh, is that even English?
Steve: Yeah, F-O….Shnitzel...Urban Dictionary defines it as: Adjective, dats tight dawg
Timmy: Uh Steve, why do you always gotta be….
*(long pause)
Rick: That guy
Timmy: Yeah, that’s the perfect way to describe him
Steve: Wait what? Did you just call me THAT guy? Now Im confused, what does that even mean?
Rick: You know…your just that guy…that uugh
Timmy: Well Its really hard to say what it means but your definitely that guy
Steve: Well could you gimme some examples when ive been that guy?
Rick: Well uuh lemme think, ok remember last week when you….
*(Walk off stage: Stagehand yells “That guy who drops bombs”)
*(Steve and Rick walk out to center stage)
Rick: Have you seen Timmy around? I gotta tell him something important.
Steve: Oh what is it?
Rick: Ok, I may have…kinda accidently driven over Timmy’s dog a couple days ago.
Steve: You ran over Sonic!.....the Hedgedog, well is he dead?
Rick: Well he’s not moving…or breathing…and I kinda buried him in my backyard…so yeah
Steve: You Monster!
Rick: SHhhh he’s coming, remember I feel really bad and I wanna be the one to tell timmy
Steve: Nooo problem bra
Both rick and Steve : hey timmy
Timmy: Hey guys....so have either of you seen Sonic? I haven’t seen him for a couple of days, im kinda worried
Rick: *sighs* Listen Timmy, so the other day I was late for school and uh, it was raining outside and I was combing my hair cause you know I gotta look good, and I felt this bump…and….*sigh*
Steve: DUDE HE MURDERED YOUR DOG! *pointing at rick*
*Devastated look by Timmy* Are you guys serious?
Rick: yyeaah it was an accident
Timmy: You killed Sonic!....the Hedgedog! I’m so mad I could….aaaaagh!!!!!! *rips shirt and runs off stage crying*
Rick: I thought you said you wouldn’t say anything!
Steve: You were beating around the bush!
Rick: I can’t believe you! *storms off*
*Steve standing awkwardly and confused*
* Stage hand yells”That guy who is a sore loser”*
*Rick and Timmy are playing games*
Steve: God I love video games.
Timmy: yeah me too, especially when I’m beating, you like right now
Steve: It’s not over til the fat pigs fly!
Timmy: *Looks over* Whatever… woaah, Gretzsky with the puck! Dangle! Oh breakaway he shoots he scccooo…
Steve: *spikes controller and kicks wii*
Steve: God I hate video games!
Timmy: Do you hate them cause you lost?
Steve: What? The game wasn’t even over
Timmy: Ok we were playing golden goal and I definitely just scored…meaning I won
Steve: What are you talking about the game mysteriously shut off
Timmy: You kicked my wii! I paid a thousand dollars for that!
Steve: Well then you got cheated out of your money
Rick: Steve you totally lost, that goal was good
Steve: It couldn’t have been good because the game ended in a tie!
Timmy: You are such a sore loser! Gosh Im so sick of you! Uuugh! *Storms off and stops halfway and turns*
Timmy: You owe me a thousand dollars!
Steve: What’s his problem?
Rick: Dude cmon not cool
*”That guy whos always negative”*
Rick: Dude, Jenny’s having a FAT party tonight! It is going to be off-the-HOOK!
Timmy: Wait the Jenny that smells like a Butthole or rich Jenny?
Rick: Rich Jenny of course!
Timmy: The one with the mansion?!
Rick: Heck yeah, her parents said we could go CRA-ZAY!
*Tongue hand shake* *Notice Steve isn’t doing the handshake*
Rick: Dude why are you doing the hand shake? Aren’t you jacked for this?
Steve: *In a sad voice* Weeell, this morning… my mom gave me a long list of chores…I have to walk the cat, do the dishes, clean my room, vacuum the floors, take out the trash, water the plants, reshingle the roof, and do the taxes.
Timmy: Wow…that’s too bad
Steve: That’s not even the worst part. I’ve got to organize the shed open the blinds, wash the cat, do my homework, paint the lawn, mow the cat, learn karate, dust the knick-knacks, clean the litterbox…for the cat, refill the toilet water, and take the cat to its tuba lesson.
Rick: uuugh but at least you have the party to forward to.
Steve: Sounds lame…
Rick: How’s it gonna be lame?! She has a chocolate fountain, 2 trampolines, a pool in her trampoline, and a bumping sound system! Its gonna be just awesome!
Steve: Well, the musics gonna suck, itll be too loud, ill get a headache, I won’t wanna talk to the beautiful women who are gonna be lined up to talk to me, I wont wanna dance, see its just gonna be totally lame…everything’s lame
Timmy: Wow I was really excited but now…I just don’t know
Rick: You are such a bummer Steve!
*Timmy and Rick walk away, Steve stands sadly alone* Scene Ends
stagehand yells That guy who takes things too far…uugh I hate that guy!
Rick: Uggh I can’t believe Gary cheated on that test. Now we all have to retake it.
Timmy: What was Gary thinking?
Rick: God that so frustrating
Timmy: Hes so dumb
Steve: LET’S KILL HIMMMM!
Timmy: WOOOAh toooo far dude
Steve: I was just kiiiiddding!
Rick: Then why’d you say it?
Steve: I was trying to be funny…I don’t know
Timmy: Never say that, you always say weird crap like that, Quit taking things too far
Steve: Dude I was KIIDDDING, get off my back
Rick: Steve, you really have some problems you need to work out
*Rick and Timmy both leave Steve on stage*
*Back to present*
Rick: So do you get it now? How you are that guy
Steve: (Steves texting) Sorry what? (puts phone away)
Timmy: Were you texting the whole time we were explaining that?
Steve: No dude I was listening
Timmy: OK what were we talking about?
Steve: Sonic the hedgedog? And mowing the cat, and tuba lessons if I remember right
Rick: I can’t believe you….You truly are the definition of THAT GUY
Timmy: You frustrate me so much, Steve. You just, just Ahhhhh *shirt rip with rick too
*Steve rips shirt just to fit in
*Everyone walks off and Rick comes back*
Murphy: Hello, Im Alex Murphy, we just saw a comedic performance portraying that guy, but it is truly not a laughing matter. We all have a “Steve” in our lives and we all know that guy. The morale of the story don’t be that guy, Don’t be Steve.
* Guy in audience stands up*
HEY, MY NAMES STEVE!
Murphy: Somebody get him outa here!
*Guy gets dragged out by security*
Murphy: Ahem—thank you and enjoy the rest of the show.
