when you have a child, don't call him something crap
cos when they grow up, they gonna hit you a slap
call him Sean, call him Jack
for if you call him anus, hes gonna get you back
name don't shame, for they'll grow up and hunt you down like game
different with a dog, you can call them Rover
shit head or bollocks, and they'll still roll over
you cant do it with a child, its a serious game
ever see a dog get bullied, cos it has a stupid name
name don't shame, for they'll cut you up and hide you in the drain
you'll be sitting in a home, where the carer's don't care
in a damp old room, in a rickety old chair
feeling all forgotten and melancholy
crying my son Adolph never visits me
name don't shame, or they'll shoot you like a horse thats gone lame
don't call him Judas, call him Tom
don't call him Tokyo Sexwhale , call him John
don't call her Vaginus, call her Jane
don't call her deed poll, call her elaine
name don't shame, or they'll push you in front of low flying planes
